How much do looks matter?
They definitely help get a foot in the door with some guys... but beyond that? Male PUAs refer to women using a numerical system (brunette 9.5, blonde 10), which is based pretty much on appearance as far as I can tell. So it's obviously important... but is a friendly smile going to go further than a sexy dress?
To take it further, what kinds of clothes attract what kinds of guys? Does the aforementioned friendly smile work on the same guy whether you're in a slinky red dress, or a t-shirt and jeans, or a suit? What about a sporty look versus something goth? Can you get the same guys with different looks, or are certain men going to go only for a certain style? And is it better to just "be yourself" or to explore and try out different looks, even if they're not totally natural?
Hm. Things to ponder...
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Judging the book by its cover?
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3 comments:
A smile always goes a long way in my book but it has to be more than your casual smile. Holding that eye contact and giving a mischievous smile always excite me. Not only does it make you look friendlier, warmer but it also makes you feel more attainable.
I know that for some guys, girls can seem rather intimidating so a smile will only encourage him more to talk to you and get to know you.
As far as looks goes, I like the "feminine" look. You don't have to go overboard with skanky outfits but anything that fits well is always a head turner.
Just realize as you browse the male PUA community that some guys are strictly focused on meeting the hottest women whereas some men are more into meeting high quality ones. Therefore based on which goal they have, looks will play a bigger or less important role in their behavioral decisions.
Great insights! Thanks. :)
I've been noticing the eye contact with a smile thing more lately... it can be a very, very powerful flirting tool. Maybe the simplest ways really are the best?
Hi,
I've wondered the same thing for a while, myself. So I started paying attention to the women who seem to get tons of attention, without asking for it. And I found some interesting things...
In Baltimore, where the underground hip-hop and Club bass scene is HUGE, you'd expect the most popular girls in those circles to look like they just stepped out of a Destiny's Child or Rihanna video. But no! One of the most adored and desired girls in those circles is this cute, short little white art school chick, with wild dreadlocks and little hippie outfits. So, I asked one of our more famous DJs about her, and his response: "She is really fun, and she's so comfortable in her own skin, and she always is smiling and having a great time."
Basically, I think this confirms what we've been thinking: Of course dressing well will give you certain kinds of attention, but smiling, having fun, and really being yourself can score much more attention.
As for my own experience, a few months ago I stopped changing out of my nice work clothes when going out. Even though I am often overdressed for the local pub or a party at the recording studio, I always look not only put together and pretty, but, as my friend eloquently put it, "You look so corporate bad-ass." And I've picked up men of all scenes, beatboxers and rock stars, engineers and CEOs.
Just my thoughts :)
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